Coach Greg Adams – Podcaster: Free Agent Lifestyle Podcast | YouTube: CoachGregAdams | Founder: Adams Fit System | Author: Free Agent Lifestyle | Divorce Coach | Award Winning, Competitive Impromptu Speaker | Former College Basketball Coach | C.S.C.S., M.S
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Full Question:
Hello Coach Greg,
My name is Michael
I like all your posts. I wanted to reach out to you and ask you one question regarding a woman I got pregnant accidentally . I am 25 years old, all my life involved in Catholic school and come from a family involved in Catholic Church as well.
When I made this mistake I was involved in no other sin other than premarital sex. In my entire life I’ve had sex 3 times by choice due to my beliefs. One of the times resulted in me getting a girl pregnant who is now 8 weeks pregnant. The reason I had sex is because I clearly fell weak to lust on this day. I’ve watched your videos and other positive videos about controlling lust and videos related to Catholicism, I go out of my way to help feed people and care for people. I know this was partly my fault but I know I don’t want to be with this woman at all but I want to be part of this child’s life so I plan on only having a friendship with this woman for life which I have explained to this woman clearly.I feel i’ve lived my life going above and Beyond to help people and help myself with taking good care of myself. I even work full time helping people transition from prison life or people who have behavior challenges. I don’t blame God or anyone for what has happened but I feel confused cause even though I know I made a huge,huge. huge mistake of having sex with a girl without protection how could my mistake now lead to a lifetime of consequences/challenges? What advice can you give me for this situation I got myself into?
This woman is 33 years old and already has another child from a previous marriage but seems to be morally a good person. I’ve only known her for about 3 months. I never had sex without protection until now and this woman told be she was on birth control so I fell weak and made a stupid decision to have sex with her without protection but I did not even cum inside her but we know how precum can get a girl pregnant. She says she really was on birth control but that it does not guarantee 100%. I’ve thought of the worst like what if this woman wanted a child from me or what if she did this to intentionally try to find a way for her to attempt to keep me as a boyfriend since she knew from the beginning that I did not want to be in a relationship with her but rather just as company since I am never the type of person to lie or manipulate. I was honest with her from the beginning and told her I did not want a relationship but that we could hangout (Meaning being kiss buddies or someone to fool around with). I truly believe what happened was an accident but It is still in the works of finding out clearly why this happened. I definitely plan on getting a paternity test. She also explained to to me that she will not want any money from me or for me to even be in this child’s life if I don’t want to but she still seems to be totally ok with me being in this child’s life . However, I will try my best to be in this child’s life because I know how crucial it is for a child to have biological father.
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